worst experience of my life

[thesignguy]

So sat. i went to take my dog for a pisser, opened my front door took 2 steps out and felt something go in my ear. It fluttered a bit and I did my best spazzout move to get him out. Seemed cool but with the mass swarming of bugs by my front door light I decided to take a step back inside, and do the ol leash hooked on the doorknob trick. I stud slightly freaked out but calm by my sofa until... the bug startes crawling around inside my ear out of reach from my fingers. I call out to my wife "Ginger your gonna need to come in here" just then he starts flapping his wings inside my freaking head. I then go into what appeared from the outside to be a spastic ceasure screaming "GINGER NOW YOU NEED TO COME HERE NOW!!"
She proceeds to enter the room with not knowing what the hell was going on because I was in no shape to explain my situation. Once he stopped flapping I was ok enuff to explain and we got a flashlight to try and get him out. Everytime I would pull on my earlobe to give her a good look see he would crawl deeper. I was cussing and shaking my head violently somehow convincing myself I was going to drive myself up to the hospital. She convinced me to give her a chance to pull him out with tweezers. So I propped my head firmly against a door frame so I could push that way if/when he made his next move. She dug deep which was completely annoying in itself and he kept moving/flapping. Finally after 5 minutes or so and a total of 15+ minutes she got him out. Luckily my recent lack of heigine aided in the recovery of the lil green man, as seen in the wax covered picture bellow. Enjoy

[Madsser3200]

damn..
i have tried that..
but he just flew right out again..

btw that some real earwax..
damn man..
kinda gross..

[thebullet]

oh man, that gave me those chills/goosebumps all over while reading that. I'd be freaking the hell out if that happened to me. Dammit I hate bugs. Gnarly.

Nightmares.

[Demzilla]

i just got the chills reading that...


i woulda went ape shit asap...
and left to er....

im stetchy like tat...

thank god you got it out....


TIME TO BOMB YOUR WHOLE HOUSE HAHAHAHA

AHUAHA
HAH
AH
AH

no seriously..

i dont fuck around...

[heshfield]

Im sure it was hell, but it makes for a good story. That thing is nasty lookin, with or without the wax. I bet your glad thats over. I'd be wearing a winter hat, earmuffs, or a full misquiito mask whenever I went out that front door again.

[robley]

that is seriously one of my biggest fears. you always hear stories about like a roach crawling into somebody's ear and laying eggs in their brain and OHADOIRUT0AS9DGU0OZJCGKLFUCK.

[SonicKaos]

ewww i also got chills just reading that lol... so nasty

[Tubilakken]

ewwwww ( in a little schoolgirl voice) that sounds nasty ... I fluckin hate bugs...

[G Ryin]

*shudders*

dude...

[andersatan]

I can't tell where ear wax ends and bug begins, gonna have to put tape or somtehing over my ears when I go outside from now on...

[Piktro]

and this my friends, is why I wear a beanie in Hawaii! lol!

[BeastySteez]

Dude you've got yourself a good woman...

She'll put up with pulling a bug out of your ear, and doesn't care how much wax is in there... You got a pretty sweet deal dude.

[thesignguy]

I dont think i mentioned how she was laughing at me the whole
Time. We have been together 16 years married 12. Not much to hide.
And i have a cotton problem. I dont like the touch of the stuff. Kinda hard to explain, i have a problem with a fingernail getting snagged on the fibers. Like if i have a busting headache and there is only a new bottle of pills with the cotton still in it. I will deal with the headache or bust open the bottle with a hammer. Only haynes white sox and no
Q-tips def no q-tips only twisted paper towwels touch my ears.
But yes me and Ginger are 1 in the same. Same life long friends, same growin up neighborhood, same school. We actually like each other, strange i know.

[Embers BLS]

Dude, that was like reading "Goosebumps" books in elementary school.
scary... glad you got it out though.

damn. lol.

[G Ryin]

cotton is one of the most fantastic materials in the world. i'm sorry you hate it so much. lolololol.


WHAT DID COTTON EVER DO TO YOU!?!?!?!11!

[needmoretime]

you should use those ear candles. smoke the wax out

[thesignguy]

Works well at most 2 year olds bday parties
I always end up with one side of my head burnt tho

[Jack]

Holy ape fuck. When I was a kid I watched the Star Trek movie where they put the insects inside the ear for mind control and I just fucking lost in the movie theater. To this day I kill ear wigs on sight, doesn't even matter that I'm a full grown man and that I know exactly what causes my phobia, it's just instant, full revulsion. I could let a tarantula crawl over me and not even blink, but any insect inside my ears just, . . . I don't even want to talk about it.

Signguy, your wife deserves a backrub bro, a long one. That's love.

[thesignguy]

Ricardo montobon ftw
Im sure i butured the hell out of his name haha
Yeah that clip crossed my mind along with my life in those few minutes

[Hitmanx123]

gotdamn bugs......

[Anchors]

That's crazy. Good thing I wasn't there, I'd would have shoved your head underwater to "drown" the bug, but it probally would have made things worse.

[Monk]

talk about uncomfortable awkward moments.............

[SCREAM]

moral of the story....

fuck porch lights and flyin insects...

and nazi's....

[Madsser3200]

moral of the story....

fuck porch lights and flyin insects...

and nazi's....

f-- word scream..

[StompDatGoomba]

poor abe. he didn't have to suffer

[rickygips]

Your stories are really mind-boggling. Well, for me, there was this day when a series of bad things came to me as if I was in a sick program or something. I fell into a puddle, I got stuck in an elevator for ten minutes and I came late and got dismissed by my professor.