Rap of the Week?

[Antwan]

I thought this would be fun to do.. what do you think?
lyrics;;
Comin with flows 3 ticks shorter than the life of an electrician cause im the technician I'm more intense than a barb wired fence cause its critical and im literal like the pentagon when I'm gone homie who you think is dissin antwanthepawn
just havin fun nawwww meeean?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGMRAgT-tao

[saunders420]

I believe we should turn this into a community event.

The Laughs we could have.

[EternalRewind]

cool

btw what happened to the other rap u had posted?

[Antwan]

Attempt 2.. still trying to figure out what to do with my tone and volume of the voice clip but you know..

[Flea]

i think your voice / style / flow sounds best in the most recent one ! slightly higher / more excited - sounds really good man i bet if you keep going with writing you'd come out with some ill sounding stuffs!

i'll collab with u :P

[Flea]

when i say 'most recent' i really mean the one you started this thread with...

[replicant]

The volume of your voice is fine in the clips, but the tone is a bit too high.
You're running jazz inflected break beats with closer to spoken word rap over top of it.
You need a bit of a deeper tone to your voice and a touch of spacing in some of the phrasing.
"Some say the world will end in fire.... (cont) and would suffice." That entire phrase is offbeat, rushed, and almost mumbled.
No idea how serious you are about this, but it's my 2 cents.

[MF JORDAN]

what up twan just Just Passing Through love what you have going on here.
an i totally Second That idea for freestyle battle rap.

[EG Fr0sty]

In my words while I'm playing Call Of Duty......Fuck Second Chances...lol

Also rap battles can't be judged by forum post because it's all about fussing how the other flows...Battling is all about face to face can't do that over the Internet unless you get a cap card and record a party chat (ding...Lightbulb lights up)....Do that....Iteould be sick

[DonVigo]

Holy fucking doubletheposts in a day off, batman!

A) Antwan, my brother, all I'm going to add is take a page from the Gordon Ramsay playbook. The guy doesn't want any positive feedback, he only wants to hear the negative. The bad shit is what you need to improve, so why focus on what you're already doing well unless you can use it to improve a shortcoming? I don't buy that you're not out to improve as you work, as I see you improving. Even if someone seems like a dick when they're giving you negative feedback, just sift the reality out of it, and let the stuff that doesn't matter sluff off. I know it's all done and over with, but man, I think you're a good dude, and you deserve to get decent.

B) As I don't see any of "thadeuce's" posts, I'm assuming the problem got solved, and I guess we all owe Mamba a thanks for that. But, Duce, don't feed the troll, bro. You seem like a wicked smart dude, and I'm sure you're heated, but I'm also sure you know that launching incindiary comments back at a dude will only fuel the fire. Not trying to bag on you, as it seems some shit that was WAY out of line was said, but if you pay attention to it, some form of validation is found, and the problem continues on. Much love, and man, if I was the guy standing next to you in a bar when someone shittalked your wife, I'd save you the night in a cell and lay 'em out. Just sayin', and again, I'm sure you know this... Teh interwebs is the playground of the feeble minded. Be the better man, man.

C) Fuck the battle raps. As cool as it may be to be able to pull that, I think if we're going to try and be remotely competitve around these parts we're going to kill a good vibe. Rather than get in a pissing match to see who's is biggest... Er... Who spits the best, we should all be bouncing concepts and technique around to help us all grow. I'm not participating in this shit to see who's better than who, but 'cause I have fun doing this shit and it's even better to be able to share that. If we "battle," we're just going to wind up seeing someone get heated and all this shit blow up again.

In the meantime, I just got a DOPE instrumental from my producer, and I'm getting fucked hard by the writer's block. The track is a somewhat slow guitar laiden thing, but it hits hard. Has one of those vibes that just kinda makes you get a smirk and bob your head like everything is cool, and I'll be damned if I can come up with an overall concept to complement it. Anyone have any ideas to share with a guy?!

Also, to all that have checked out my page, BIG THANKS. That's all total infancy stuff, but it's still mine. Everything you hear will be redone to some extent very soon as I'm working on getting 10-15 tracks down to have as a live setlist, and probably record 5 of them DIY style to put out an EP. If/when that happens, it'll be free, so if you're going to want a copy, like that page! Details will be posted there. In the meantime, I'm working with a friend who's an audio engineer and might just redo the vocals on a few tracks without mastering them fully just to give out to anyone who'd actually want them. If you want in on that, PM me and I'll compile a list.

Anyway, guys, fuck the drama, we got a good thing going. Much love and respect where it's due, but let's keep it due.

[MF JORDAN]

I just really wanted to hear thaduce's flow. As he spark noted his rhymes...jk but seriously

[Duce NLS]

*applauds DV*

Sorry for going off on one and cheers dude.

I'm nothing amazing but writing is what I do, so as I've said to Antwan if you want to send me some typed up rough ideas I can have a play about see if I can help at all, but to be honest I think you've got your shit covered.

I dunno if you spotted it amongst the spraying bullets but I did mention somewhere, not as a challenge to anyone but to spark a lil something, I would love to hear you each do a lil something about skating and it's origins/meaning etc to you.

Drawls, let's not poke a dying fire dude, no beef, just I really don't want to get myself banned for wasting my breath with that kid.

Let's hear some magic guys.

Peace