The fact that you recognize that you "use" things to distract you from the things you don't like to face - that is something that some people NEVER learn about themselves.
I'm not going to get all "inspirational advice over the internets" on you... but just don't be afraid to fail. At whatever you're about to do - ask a girl out, drink w/ her, kiss her, etc. A lot of people deal with anxiety like you, and it doesn't have to be something that controls your life. The more you try to overcome those fears of failure/rejection/etc and succeed, the easier it gets.
This is coming from a guy who used to be really really anxious in my teen years. I am still an anxious person, but I have learned to deal with a lot of it. I still avoid life with weed and video games though. So I don't have all the answers. Just don't let the feelings of "ooh... I'm an anxious, nervous, overthinker... how am I ever gonna (insert cool thing here)" keep you down. Fight through that shit.